Bob Cratchit (Character)  - Quotes
Bob Cratchit (Character)
Mickey's Christmas Carol (1983)
Cratchit :   Tomorrow is Christmas and I was wondering if I could have... Half a day off?
Scrooge :   Christmas, eh? Uh, er... I suppose so. But I'll dock you half a day's pay. Let's see, I pay you two shillings a day...
Cratchit :   Two shillings and a halfpenny, Sir.
Scrooge :   Oh yes, I gave you that raise three years ago.
Cratchit :   Yes, sir, when I started doing your laundry.
Fred :   Merry Christmas, Uncle Scrooge!
Scrooge :   What's so merry about it? I'll tell you what Christmas is. It's just another work day, and any jackanape who thinks else should be boiled in his own pudding!
Cratchit :   But sir, Christmas is a time for giving... a time to be with one's family.
Scrooge :   I say, Bah humbug!
Fred :   I don't care! I say, Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas!
Cratchit :  [clapping] Well said, Master Fred!
Scrooge :   Cratchit, what are you doing?
Cratchit :  [stops clapping] I was just trying to keep my hands warm, sir.
[Bob closes his book and starts to leave as the clock chimes 7:00. Scrooge looks at his watch]
Scrooge :   Hmm... Two minutes fast.
[Bob stops then goes back to his desk]
Scrooge :   Well, never mind those two minutes. You may go now.
Cratchit :   Ah, oh thank you, sir! You're so kind!
Scrooge :   Never mind that mushy stuff, just go! But be here all the other early the next day!
Cratchit :   I will, I will, sir! And a Bah Humbug... I mean, a Merry Christmas to you, sir!
Cratchit :   Oh, that Fred. Always so full of kindness.
Scrooge :   Aye. He always was a little peculiar
[door bell rings]
Cratchit :   Why, Mr. Scrooge, Merry Christmas.
[Scrooge barges in]
Cratchit :   Won't you come in?
Scrooge :   Merry Christmas? Humph! I have another bundle for you.
Cratchit :   But sir, it's Christmas Day.
Scrooge :   Christmas Day, indeed! Just another excuse for being lazy. And another thing, Cratchit: I've had enough of this 'half-day off' stuff! You leave me no alternative...
[changing his attitude]
Scrooge :   ...but to give you...
Tiny Tim :  [sees the contents of the now open bag] Toys!
Scrooge :   Yes, toys. No no no no no no no!
[lovingly]
Scrooge :   I'm giving you a raise... and making you my partner.
Cratchit :   Ha-ha. That Fred, always so full of kindness.
Scrooge :   Aye, he always was a little peculiar
[the doorbell rings again]
[In front of a toy store window]
Bob Cratchit :   Well, my loves, which one do you like best, eh?
Kathy Cratchit :   I like the dolly in the corner.
Tiny Tim :   I like all of them.
Bob Cratchit :   Good boy? And why not one in particular?
Tiny Tim :   Well... you said I can't have none of them, so I might as well like them all.
Ebenezer Scrooge :   And be good enough to leave me alone during business hours.
Nephew Fred :   Seven o'clock on Christmas Eve? That's not business hours, that's drudgery for the sake of it, and an insult to all men of goodwill.
Nephew Fred :  [surprised] Thank you, Bob Cratchit.
[Scrooge slowly turns on Cratchit]
Ebenezer Scrooge :   Another word from you, Cratchit, and you will celebrate Christmas by losing your position.
[He then slowly turns back on Fred]
Ebenezer Scrooge :   As for you, nephew, if you were in my will, I'd disinherit you!
Ebenezer Scrooge :  [to Bob] You still don't recognise me, do you Cratchit?
Bob Cratchit :   Yes. No. Er... Father Christmas?
[pulls down his mask briefly]
Mrs. Cratchit :   Mr. Scrooge? He's gone mad!
Bob Cratchit :   No, no, my dear, I'm sure there's an explanation.
Ebenezer Scrooge :   I want to see you in my office on Monday morning, when I will double your wages.
Ebeneezer Scrooge :   Cratchit, bring me the Curiosity Shop account. I saw a light and enquired at the oyster shop. They came back last night, though the old man's granddaughter is sick. Come on, come on.
[Bob Cratchit hands over the ledger]
Ebeneezer Scrooge :   If I'm not mistaken - which I never am when it concerns my money in other people's pockets - they left with their debt unpaid. Ah, there see! Eight shillings and thruppence. Do collect, Jacob, before the child dies, won't you? Before we find ourselves faced with drawn curtains and complaints about the cost of burial.
Bob Cratchit :   We intend to collect while he tends his sick granddaughter? And on Christmas Eve?
Ebeneezer Scrooge :   What? Will all things stop because she's ill? Mmm? Will he not eat, drink, relieve himself, step outside for a breath of air?
[He scoffs]
Ebeneezer Scrooge :   Well, if all these things he can do whilst his own flesh and blood lies sick in her bed, well then why shouldn't we - who have no such attachment - go about our business in a similar fashion?